am I the only one who looks at every grape before I eat it
i’m that dad who wants to start a garage band with all the other dads in the neighborhood but my wife wont let me
women: being a woman is hard
men: I thikn youre forgetting something: it is also hard to be a man. just letting you know that you forgot to mention that when you were talking about being a woman
|me in class:||wait what happened|
|me in class:||what do we do|
|me in class:||what do we write|
|me in class:||when's the test|
|me in class:||what is this|
|me in class:||how do you do this|
|me in class:||what|
one time I was working at Dolly Parton’s water park as a photographer in the lazy river, and taking pictures and what not and I look up and see this very familiar black man floating in a tube toward me.
and it is Akon. So I’m like ‘hey Akon would you like a picture with your family today?’ He is all like ‘no thank you sweetie’ and I was all “well you have a good day, Akon”
he said you too and floated on.